My list of 19 things for 2019 was a total success. I allowed it to be a success by changing up some of the items on the list. I didn’t see the point of ignoring all the things that I had managed to achieve just so that I could stick doggedly to (and fail at) a list of my own making.
I did two things I haven’t done before with regard to my yearly list of goals: a) I changed some of the goals mid-year to align with things that became more important to me as the year went one (in the past, I have doggedly stuck to my original list); and b) I completed my entire list.Continue reading “Finishing up my 19 for 2019”
At some point last school year – I can’t pinpoint it exactly – I decided that I had to make a change to my working life as it was not sustainable as it was. It had been a tough year for a lot of reasons, not all of them to do with my job. Once I had made up my mind, I knew I wanted to give a decent amount of notice to my school and once the word got around, the same question was put to me over and over: ‘What next?’Continue reading “What next.”
One of the excuses I make to myself for not writing is ‘I don’t have enough time’. This is an excuse I use for a lot of things I think I want to do but do not get done. Exercise. Memory keeping. Solving world peace. I say ‘to myself’ when it comes to writing because the hard truth is that whilst it might be something I care about, no one else in the world cares if I write or not. It will not affect anyone else’s life if I do NOT finish my first draft. It does matter to me but until it matters enough that I choose to spend more of my spare time on it, I will not make much progress. And I do have spare time – we recently managed to get through all nine seasons of The Office.
This year I have been enjoying the Happier with Gretchen Rubin podcast as well as Happier in Hollywood. Gretchen and Liz (her TV writer sister) are creating 18 for 2018 lists and since I have been missing my birthday lists, I thought I’d jump on board. I have made most of them finite things I can do throughout the year with just a few that are year-long goals.
There was a fire somewhere last night. The smell of smoke was thick in the air and when I opened the windows to check the fire was outside and not burning away somewhere else in the house, the street was clouded. The acrid taste made me feel queasy and I searched online to find out what was burning. For some reason, I wanted to know and was frustrated to not find anything. In a world where a news story from across the globe can reach you in a matter of minutes, it is still a reminder that there are some things we can’t instantly know just by searching.
Today is the first day of #The100DayProject which is run by Elle Luna and Lindsay Jean Thomson. Last year, I took on too much at a time when Austin was still pretty young. I am not sure I have any less on my plate now, being back to work and balancing all that, but I do want to a) focus on positive things that make me happy b) write something every day so I have decided to have another go.
For someone who is usually only too happy to share her thoughts and feelings, it always catches me off-guard when I realise I have been bottling things up. I can always tell when I am feeling stressed because it shows in my face. Not in my expression. In my actual face. For a few days now, I’ve been plagued with itchy eyes (rampant hay fever I think) which has made the skin around my eye red and inflamed. I have eczema around my mouth and a nasty cold sore has just cleared up (I managed to ward off two other cold sore attempts with Zovirax).
Over 500 words! I am super thrilled to get some more written today. I am great at procrastinating and I really felt that the untidy state of my study was a superb excuse for not getting writing. I do still want to get my workspace in order but it is no longer a prerequisite for me to write. As Elise Joy says, you’ve got to Do the Work. Simple but so true.
In the early ours of yesterday morning, I was wide awake. Austin was sleeping (and has been brilliant this week at sleeping up to 8 hours at a time overnight) but my mind was turning and I couldn’t get to sleep.